Hi! I’m Iris.


Here are a few things you should know about me.

I am an American Born Chinese, who somehow ended up with kids who are Chinese born Americans.

My parents were immigrants who came to America seeking opportunities for themselves and their children. I was well on my way to fulfilling the “American Dream”–graduating from a top notch university and marrying a Silicon Valley engineer–when my husband and I did an about-face and headed out to China to teach English at a university. We went out in 2003, thinking we’d give it a year. Two kids, three job changes, and fourteen years later, we’re still here, figuring out how to build a life as Chinese Americans living in a country that is both foreign and familiar.

Untigering is a blog about my adventures of trying to be parent in the tension of my Chineseness and Americanness. It’s about me moving away from being a typical tiger mom, but still wanting to hold on to my cultural heritage. It’s about figuring out what I believe about identity, family, and success as an outsider to both societies. Here, you will find stories of my attempts to be a gentle parent. You will read about my grand experiment of unschooling my children. You will hear about my struggle to know which values to let go of and which ones to embrace, regardless of whether they’re from the East or West.

Thanks for joining me for the ride!

If you’d like to keep up with my weekly updates about my (mis)adventures in life and parenting, sign up for email updates below!

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